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God, how I missed it. She still climaxed and always waited for me. I few times after a party or wedding she would drink a little too much and she acted more like old times. I think I lost her trust. She didn't seem like she would completely let go anymore.I know during our arguments, of which we had many over the years, she would always bring up trust. I tried to explain to her that I couldn't change the past. I wish I could but I can't. During a couple of arguments I asked her if she wanted me to leave? All she would say is, "Leave if you want to. There is no one holding you back. Go if you want to go." It hurt me. Her not caring really hurt me.I don't know how many times I thought about leaving. I loved my kids and they loved me. I loved Mary but about the only time she said, "I Love You," was in a birthday or anniversary card. I'll take that back. Whenever I would walk up to her and say, "I love you," she would say, "I love you too." It seems strange now but that is the absolute. As they looked around, they were about as pleased as they could be given their circumstances. The apartment was certainly small, but it was cute. They were on the fifth floor of their Greystone apartment building, looking down over a small park to the river beyond and there were lots of big bright windows. The kitchen was a tiny galley kitchen, with all new high-end stainless-steel appliances and there was just enough room for their old breakfast nook table and chairs. There was a sort of closet thing to the side of the kitchen then when opened revealed and apartment sized laundry pair. Otherwise, their couch and TV pretty much filled the remainder of the open space and all that was left was a truly tiny 3-piece bathroom and another small alcove where the murphy bed could be folded down each night, and then back up and out of the way each morning.They ordered pizza, and one by one, they took turns in the bathroom, and Amber brought out a case of beer, and even thought the kids.
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